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Ozzie's Seattle
105 W Mercer St
Seattle, WA 98119
Wednesdays: 7:00 PM
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1:19 AM, March 13, 2014
Scores
Seriously, Where the Fuck is That Plane?! 72

Sorry Simon 68

Topical Reference 66

If You Believe That You Can Compensate for a Lack of Skill by Redoubling Your Efforts, There's No End to What You Can't Achieve 65

Team Joebin 54

Everything is Awesome! 52

Slinky Size It 52

Wednesday Warriors 45

The Fighting Mongooses 43

The Late Comers 17

Jared


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Quiz Schedule
Wednesday, 7 p.m., Ozzie's
Jared ()

Not so long ago, I was on a team playing quiz and we ruled the school. My personal areas of expertise were both audio rounds, anything involving movies, and American history. One night, I was the only guy in the bar who knew the name of the current prime minister of England.

We placed first almost every week. So often that it became stale and I needed a new challenge. So instead of angering fellow geeks by besting them, I decided I would anger them by doing the asking. So I became a quizmaster and I've been pissing them off ever since.  

Well, it’s official: I’m going to find a way to end every quiz in a tie so that we can have a joke-off every week. It was absolutely the highlight. Simon later confided in me that he spent many a teenage year in his room joking off. That’s how he got so good at it.

Daylight saving did quiz a world of good, as we doubled our team count from last week. Some might say too good, though. Once again, friends were cut off due to their teammate’s lust for gold and alliances were formed amongst former enemies. It was like that episode of “Seinfeld” where Jerry has to deliver mail for Newman so Newman can move to Hawaii but then Jerry’s too good at delivering the mail and the USPS knows that it wasn’t Newman on the route because all the mail got delivered and then Newman rips the patches off of Jerry’s coat, but it’s really Newman’s coat and Newman gets really mad. I miss that show.

What We Learned Tonight:

  • The Corrs sound exactly like Sixpence None The Richer, according to most teams tonight. Simon also confided to me that he’s mixed up those two bands on at least six occasions. I mean, it makes sense, the names are spelled almost exactly the same.
  • A lot of people also think that “Rhythm” and “Blues” are to two different genres of music. I don’t think I want to hear any music that falls outside of the “Rhythm” category.
  • I don’t care if you got the answer wrong, you do not boo when you find out that Koko the gorilla is still alive!

Best Worst Answers:

  • When you don’t know the movie, “Edward Startrekhands” is always a good go-to.
  • No, Rachel Canning isn’t suing her parent because they wouldn’t pay for her boob job, but this being America, it absolutely would not surprise me.
  • The Science Channel is actually turning “I Fucking Love Science!” into a TV show, which is fine and good, but if they made a show out of “Fuck, Marry, Kill” I would be front and center for every episode.

Team Name Hall of Fame:

  • Everything is Awesome! – When you work as a team!
  • Slinky Size It – I don’t know what this means, and I don’t want to know. I just like the way it rolls.
  • Topical Reference – How do they find time to keep up with current events like that?

Take ‘er easy.

Ozzie's Seattle
105 W Mercer St
Seattle, WA 98119
Wednesdays: 7:00 PM
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7:54 AM, March 06, 2014
Scores
The Braidy Bunch 81

Dorothy Mantooth is a Saint! 77

Mustache Wednesday 69

Figurine 59

Putin Told Ukraine to "Crimea" River 55

Jared


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Quiz Schedule
Wednesday, 7 p.m., Ozzie's
Jared ()

Not so long ago, I was on a team playing quiz and we ruled the school. My personal areas of expertise were both audio rounds, anything involving movies, and American history. One night, I was the only guy in the bar who knew the name of the current prime minister of England.

We placed first almost every week. So often that it became stale and I needed a new challenge. So instead of angering fellow geeks by besting them, I decided I would anger them by doing the asking. So I became a quizmaster and I've been pissing them off ever since.  

It was a Dark and Stormy night…mostly because I kept ordering Dark and Stormys. Has anyone started off a novel with that awesome twist? Well, I’m doing it, so don’t steal it!

But really, the rain was driving, and hopefully the quizzers were not. The sky water was enough to keep some teams away, but not the true believers. They came out to feel the power of quiz. And I delivered. I quizzed all up in ‘em.

Sorry.

What We Learned Tonight:

  • No one has ever heard or heard of “P. A. S. S. I. O. N.” by Rythm Syndicate. I doubt even the members of Rythm Syndicate remember that song. And yes, I’m spelling that correctly.
  • Something else no one remembers, a little movie called “Stuart Saves His Family”. I’m actually pretty sure Senator Al Franken proposed a law that would require everyone to never mention the film.
  • There are some people out there that are still living life without having heard the Mel Gibson voicemails. Do yourself and favor and listen. He’s a celebrity, so you can disassociate him with being an actual person and therefore disassociate it from being actual abuse.

 

Best Worst Answers:

  • One team wrote down “Gwen Stephanie” as an answer. Then when I read it that way, everyone looked at me like I was a wacko. I’m sorry, I don’t speak Italian.
  • I asked for the full name of the movie, so even though you guessed “City Slickers II” as the only sequel Harold Ramis ever directed, I would’ve still needed a “Legend of Curly’s Gold” for the point.

Team Name Hall of Fame:

  • The Braidy Bunch – I won’t discuss the gentleman on this team that had to take off his pants to show his braids…
  • Mustache Wednesday – The team that will slap you with a ruler if you don’t pronounce it “Must-Ash Wednesday.”
  • Putin told Ukraine to “Crimea” River – If you think puns are the key to world peace, come hold my hand.

 

I’m giving up well wishes for Lent, so I’ll just say “bye.”

Ozzie's Seattle
105 W Mercer St
Seattle, WA 98119
Wednesdays: 7:00 PM
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Comment Now
8:05 AM, February 27, 2014
Scores
Note to Self: Bring Earplugs Next Time 77

American Kurt Russell 76

Army of One…and Then More 75

The Star-Spangler Banner 74

Tacos Not Tyranny 69

Your Mom's Teeth are the Whitest I've Ever Come Across 61

No Name 59

Family Reunion 7

Jared


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Quiz Schedule
Wednesday, 7 p.m., Ozzie's
Jared ()

Not so long ago, I was on a team playing quiz and we ruled the school. My personal areas of expertise were both audio rounds, anything involving movies, and American history. One night, I was the only guy in the bar who knew the name of the current prime minister of England.

We placed first almost every week. So often that it became stale and I needed a new challenge. So instead of angering fellow geeks by besting them, I decided I would anger them by doing the asking. So I became a quizmaster and I've been pissing them off ever since.  

“Yo…see my tree…it’s Christmas!” That’s probably the funniest start to a Christian parody of Vanilla Ice there ever was. That’s probably the only start to a Christian parody of Vanilla Ice there ever was. I’m forgetting what bible verse mentions the Christmas tree…

Tonight had another thrilling conclusion as two teams tied for first and had to enter the Thunderdome of Sudden Death. And as with all Sudden Death rounds, I went with a sports question. In addition to knowing a lot about children’s public television shows, Note to Self: Bring Earplugs Next Time knows what country Zidane played for. Which brings me to my pitch for a PBS show starring the footbol player: “Brain-Butt” It’s educational, you see.

 What We Learned Tonight:

  • “Cat’s In the Cradle” was not performed by Cat Stevens. Much in the same way “How Deep Is Your Love” isn’t performed by Deep Purple.
  • If the answer is “Carlos Mencia” and you write down “George Lopez,” you’re going to be labeled a secret racist. Congrats.
  • Pretty much every single team knew who Ron Jeremy was just by seeing an isolated mustache. Huh.

 Best Worst Answers:

  • You got the answer right, but I’m still going to make fun of you if you wrote Aerosmith as “Arrowsmith.”
  • I also have to give a big shout-out to American Kurt Russell, who had so many correct answers in round 8, but crossed them out in favor of very wrong answers.

Team Name Hall of Fame:

  • The Star-Spangler Banner – a fitting tribute to a legend
  • Note to Self: Bring Earplugs Next Time – a passive aggressive critique? I’ll allow it.
  • Your Mom’s Teeth are the Whitest I’ve Ever Come Across – Always nice to see a good old-fashioned compliment.

 

Have a great week!

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