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McCabe's Tavern
520 S Tejon St
Colorado Springs, CO 80903
Wednesdays: 8:00 PM
View All Posts
Comment Now
10:11 AM, August 21, 2014
Scores
Unitarian Jihad 76

Beta 69

Let's Talk About Sects 67

Halal! Is It Meat You're Looking For? 66

Blood, Sweat & Beers 65

The Munchausens 65

Bitchin Since '92 61

Pat Sajak's Vowel Movement 60

Wet Dreamcatchers 57

Hey, It's Wednesday 46

Red Spam 14

Fuckmaster Emeritus


Web

Quiz Schedule
Wednesdays at McCabe's Tavern.
Aaron (Fuckmaster Emeritus)

Aaron's been quizmastering since before you were born. He's occasionally hilarious when he's not being sort of a dick. Things that make him giggle include: Li'l Jon; gamboling puppies; the word "oatmeal." No idea why. He's doing preeeeeetty well for himself, thank you.

Hee-hee, you guys. So. In the golden days of yore, when I was a wee tiny young quizmaster, I used to have something called the shot counter. The shot counter, as you might be able to guess, counted shots. Shots that I would get people to buy me and then drink. Shots that were made of alcohol that would get me drunk. I drank many of these shots, guys, and the shot counter counted them off one by one. There were nights that I bemoaned the shot counter not counting into double digits. There was a quiz on my 30th birthday wherein somebody bought me 30 shots. I drank shots, and I drank a lot of them, and the shot counter made indelible that nightly number.

I bring this up because I don't drink like that anymore. The shot counter has been given away to worthier parties and these days at quiz I'll have like one beer. Maybe two, if I'm feeling extra frisky. Except for last night, when I just got all boozeballs. And this post functions not as an apology—because I was HILARIOUS—but as a way of explaining why I was more hilarious than usual. The answer is beer.

Whom did I treat to my wobbly chuckles? Why, I'm glad you asked. The answer is about eleven teams—not a barnburner of a night, but a fun 'un—of the bestest ever people I ever did meet. Except for stupid Unitarian Jihad, who won again because they're bad people. And Brian is also a bad person, but he played alone last night as Beta and totally came in third, for which I have to salute him, albeit with a hand I just used to wipe my butt. And then there's Let's Talk About Sects, whose name is a pun I don't understand because I don't really get, you know, language. There was a team of Dutch Brothers owners that I might have yelled at a little bit (but HILARIOUSLY!) and a team of Catholics who didn't answer "Catholicism" to the one question where it was the right answer and a team made up all of multicolored imaginary bears who were perpetually on fire, except that might have been a dream I had.

Next week it's iced tea. L8er, sk8er.

McCabe's Tavern
520 S Tejon St
Colorado Springs, CO 80903
Wednesdays: 8:00 PM
View All Posts
Comment Now
8:44 AM, August 14, 2014
Scores
Pat Sajak's Vowel Movements 77

Your Robin Williams Team Name Is Gauche 71

Don Quixote Punch 66

Rufiooooooo! 64

Brainiac X 63

Halal, Is It Meat You're Looking For? 58

Unitarian Jihad 56

Jones Sais Quoi 56

The Doubtfires 55

Blood, Sweat & Beers 51

Whale Tails 49

Just Here For the Football 47

Clit Commanders 44

Dong on Titties 37

Fuckmaster Emeritus


Web

Quiz Schedule
Wednesdays at McCabe's Tavern.
Aaron (Fuckmaster Emeritus)

Aaron's been quizmastering since before you were born. He's occasionally hilarious when he's not being sort of a dick. Things that make him giggle include: Li'l Jon; gamboling puppies; the word "oatmeal." No idea why. He's doing preeeeeetty well for himself, thank you.

Let's get this out of the way, loves: It was super swell and awesome that none of our usual winners won last night. Usually, it's all Unitarian Jihad this and Brainiac X that and on a night where they're both there it's pretty much a lock that one of them will win the hell out of everything. But lo, that weren't the case last night! Not by a long shot! Unitarian Jihad did so piss-poor that in retrospect, I'm sort of surprised they managed to spell their name right. Instead, it was Underdog Night, or if you're Teutonically-inclined, Unterhundnacht, which—let's be fair—just sounds way more awesome and sinister.

Speaking of sinister, yesterday was National Lefty Day, wherein all of us southpaws receive our due adulation as the next phase in human evolution. We're sort of like the X-Men of always scrubbing graphite dust off the side of our hands. So it works well that Your Robin Williams Team Name is Gauche claimed the coveted second-place spot, because lefties, and because lefties are historical underdogs and are oppressed by society and they came in second and it's a metaphor. Keep up.

In first were Pat Sajak's Vowel Movements, who sometimes win but usually don't win and anyway they won. They were really happy about this. Probably. I didn't really ask them because everytime I talk to them they ask me to play Michelle Branch.

And in third? Some buttholes calling themselves Don Quixote Punch, which was a slapped-together three-person supergroup made up of teams of yore.

Oh hey, Blood, Sweat and Beers: so when I was talking about Geek Bowl IX and how important it is that a Colorado Springs team win and you were like, "Hell yeah, we'll win!" and I rolled my eyes at you and said, "Come on now. Let's be realistic"? I wasn't implying that you wouldn't win Geek Bowl. I was simply saying that the actual quiz part of Geek Bowl you wouldn't do very well on. The other, actually important parts, like team spirit and optimism and being adorable, you'd totally nail. Just so we're clear.

McCabe's Tavern
520 S Tejon St
Colorado Springs, CO 80903
Wednesdays: 8:00 PM
View All Posts
Comment Now
10:08 AM, August 07, 2014
Scores
Unitarian Jihad 86

Chalupa Batman is America's Next Top Model 81

Team Drawing of a Girafficorn 71

Halal! Is It Meat You're Looking For? 60

DVDA 58

Pat Sajak 56

Blood, Sweat & Beers 51

Pho-Q 45

The Classics 43

It's Too Hard 41

Fuckmaster Emeritus


Web

Quiz Schedule
Wednesdays at McCabe's Tavern.
Aaron (Fuckmaster Emeritus)

Aaron's been quizmastering since before you were born. He's occasionally hilarious when he's not being sort of a dick. Things that make him giggle include: Li'l Jon; gamboling puppies; the word "oatmeal." No idea why. He's doing preeeeeetty well for himself, thank you.

You guys, I was so excited to use that Westboro Baptist Church round last night. You have no idea. I was peeing my tiny little pantalones all over the place. Because really, there's nothing better than hateful, poorly executed covers that completely reverse the themes of the originals. They're the Weird Al of bigotry! And, as you know, anything that can be called the Weird Al of anything is the best. For instance, the sandwich I just made totally mocks regular sandwiches by putting the cheese on the bottom instead of the top. It's the Weird Al of sandwiches! But I digest. (HAHAHAHAHA.)

Um, there was quiz? Not the silly-ass barnburner of the previous week, but a nice-ish turnout nonetheless, and everyone was in a good mood and we high-fived mentally. I was highly impressed by the show on last night's R6, which was dry and academic and wonderful, and you nerds availed yourself well by reaching back to your freshman philosophy courses and spitting out "pragmatism." Metaphorically. I hope.

So. Unitarian Jihad won again. Blarg to that, except they did really really well and not even I can begrudge them that. And hey, Chalupa Batman Is America's Next Top Model came in second! So, yay? And then! Team Drawing of a Girafficorn, whose name I made up because their team name was literally a drawing of a giraffe with a horn and wings—which, technically, would make it a girafficornasus, but that just sounds ridiculous—got third place and then left before I could give them money. 

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