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Natty Greene's Brewing Co.
505 West Jones Street
Raleigh, NC 27603
Tuesdays: 7:30 PM
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10:49 AM, February 11, 2015
Scores
Back At It 77

Lasagna For One 76

What's More Romantic Than a Dildo Party/Murder? 73

Looks Like We Picked the Wrong Week to Stop Sniffing Glue 71

The Double-sided Flaming Dildo 66

RealLifeButtParty.com 65

Are We Not Men? We Are Monkey Team 63

It's Too Late to RuPaulolgize 63

Hatty Hattington's Ship of Friendship 61

I'm Ron Burgundy? 61

Titanic Swim Team 61

Untitled 60

Belly Button Loginc 59

Brian Williams' Blackhawk Clown 59

Storm's a Brewin' 56

What's Half of Tenth Place? 55

I Don't Do Cocaine, I Just Like The Way It Smells 53

Totes McGoats 45

The Rookies 41

Bar Blondes 26

Hoffstradamus


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Quiz Schedule
Tuesdays at Natty Greene's - 7:30PM-9:30PM (Raleigh, NC)
Alex Hofford (Hoffstradamus)

Hola! My name is Alex and I am the Quizmaster at Natty Greene's in Raleigh. I also perform comedy in the Triangle at DSI Comedy and with the improv group BONE CRACKER.

Ointment is a weird word.

Geek Bowl 9 was this past weekend, and it was yet another epic event for all things “quiz.” Located at the Isleta Resort & Casino just outside of Albuquerque, NM, hordes of nerds and geeks assembled for our biggest prize offerings yet - the first place team got $7500(!). 

And, in a shocking turn, a team from Durham, NC - East Coast Super Sound Quiz of Today!- placed 5th to take home some cash for themselves. NORTH CAROLINAAAAAAA, RAISE UP! So awesome. Yeah, none of the quizzers at my venue went. FOR SHAME!

It was my first visit to New Mexico, and here are some quick thoughts about the trip:

- Literally everything is brown. The buildings, landscape, and food - all brown.

- “Red or green?” is the question you will be asked anytime you order food because most everything comes with chile on top of it. Both taste good, but I think colorful options are provided because, again, everything is brown.

- Casinos, in and of themselves, are the best cautionary tale anyone can look at. Thick clouds of smoke. Butt creases on the chairs in front of slot machines. I sat with a guy at the blackjack table who said he just found out he was going to have a daughter. What did he do after that? He bet $50 on one hand of 21, and busted on one hit. *Cue The Price is Right fail music*.

- Uber is cheaper than cabs, by far. I know this is the case everywhere, but it was still cool to see independent drivers sticking it to the cab establishment.

- I didn’t visit any of the Breaking Bad shooting locations on purpose, but I’m sure I ended up at one at some point. Everything is the same color (brown), so it was hard to tell.

———————————————

Three of our most seasoned teams duked it out all night to take home the top prizes, but only two could go home with something. Lasagna for One narrowly lost to Back At It for second place, who marked their triumphant return to the quiz. Well, only if “triumphant” means “still not better than one team.” Friday the 13th XXX: Jason Likes Bondage crept up on everyone the entire night, and at the end, they slayed their foes for a first place finish. Well done, peeps.

———————————————

Interesting Notes from the Quiz!:

- Since when did “Seven Nation Army” become EVERY school’s fight song? Shit’s everywhere.

- Tonight’s quiz proved that this large group of adults was better equipped to answer questions about cartoons (avg. score - 7.35) than they were about U.S. geography (avg. - 4.19).

- Thank you for the free advertising, RealLifeButtParty.com.

- According to my friends, Jupiter Ascending is the funniest movie in theaters right now.

Awesome Team Name Shout-Outs!:

- What’s More Romantic Than a Dildo Party/Murder?

- RealLifeButtParty.com

- It’s Too Late to RuPaulogize

- Friday the 13th Part XXX: Jason Likes Bondage

- What’s Half of Tenth Place?

- Brian Williams’ Blackhawk Clown

———————————————

Follow me on Twitter! - @ahoff101

Like the music at the quiz? Check out the Spotify playlist! Geeks Who Drink - Raleigh Jamz

Natty Greene's Brewing Co.
505 West Jones Street
Raleigh, NC 27603
Tuesdays: 7:30 PM
View All Posts
Comment Now
8:49 AM, February 04, 2015
Scores
This American Ape Life 78

Lasagna For One 75

It's A Full Moon Tonight 74

You Wouldn't Download a Cat 72

FILEPOINT 71

Stouffer's Family Size Lasagna 71

Deflaters Gonna Deflate 70

Come to the 2015 Southern Farm Show! 65

Third Reich-and-Roll 65

All I've Had Today is Like Six Gummi Bears and Some Scotch 64

Gitch Your Butt Party On 64

I'm Voting For Jeb 64

Halal! Is it Meat You're Looking For? 63

I Thought This Was Speed Dating 63

Disneyland Causes Autism 62

Blackface Jefferson 61

Dancing Sharks 56

#teamname 55

Revenge of the Deflated Ballz 52

Raise Hell, Praise Dale 51

Raleigh Rawdawg 42

Multiple Scoregasms 13

Hoffstradamus


Twitter
Web

Quiz Schedule
Tuesdays at Natty Greene's - 7:30PM-9:30PM (Raleigh, NC)
Alex Hofford (Hoffstradamus)

Hola! My name is Alex and I am the Quizmaster at Natty Greene's in Raleigh. I also perform comedy in the Triangle at DSI Comedy and with the improv group BONE CRACKER.

Ointment is a weird word.

At the beginning of the year, I said I’d watch a terrible movie conveniently found on Netflix and review it for everyone. Well, “review” insinuates I’m objectively critiquing the film, but I’m totally going into each viewing expecting a steaming pile of celluloid.

For this month’s movie, I wanted to be taken on an adventure to a tropical paradise, so I chose…

Into the Blue 2: The Reef.

First, let me answer the questions that are rushing through your brain right now. Yes, this is a real movie. Yes, it’s a sequel to a Paul Walker/Jessica Alba movie. No, neither of them are in it. And, yes, of course it went straight to video.

Now that we got that out of the way, let’s dive in, shall we? See what I did there? Because the movie is about div…forget it.

Into the Blue 2: The Reef is basically a 90-minute Spike TV commercial. This film is what happens if someone wanted to make an action movie look like a softcore porno. There are bikinis everywhere, and countless scene transitions featuring swimming, volleyball, some more swimming, a “rave” party, and even more swimming.

The movie takes place in Hawaii, and the plot centers around a couple who are dive masters who lead dives to sunken ships and potentially buried treasure. OOOOOOOOOOOH, fancy.

By the way, the male lead, Sebastian, is played by Chris Carmack, who very few of you would recognize as Marissa’s (Mischa Barton) doucher boyfriend Luke from The O.C. I don’t know why I’m pointing that out. I guess I’m just sad that I knew he acted in something else before this. Oh, and Audrina Patridge from Laguna Beach is in this, too. This movie is full of low points for me.

Our lead couple gets approached by another couple looking to pay handsomely for a toured dive over the next few days. Of course they take the offer because that how movie plots move along, and we’d only have a 27-minute short film if they didn’t.

When chatting about their upcoming dive over dinner, Sebastian tells the group, “Fear can keep you alive. Especially underwater,” to which his new business parter replies, “Here’s to fear.” *glasses clink*

THAT’S THE BAD GUY, YOU IDIOT. Who the fuck says things like that?

Of course, the plot twists when we find out the visiting tourist couple have actually been hired by a criminal organization to fetch a couple of containers with bomb parts in them from the bottom of the ocean. UH-OH SPAGHETTI-O’S! I wonder what happens next?!?!

The ending will remain unrevealed in case you are jonesing to catch this movie. If you do, expect plenty more terrible dialogue, random boobs, and a harpoon gun (even though they hardly see any fish to actually use the harpoon on).

Out of five piles of dogshit (the more, the shittier), this movie gets 2/5.

—————————————————

Lasagna for One not only had to temper the blows from other teams vying for the first place finish the whole night, they were also called out by Stouffer’s Family Size Lasagna via team name. In the end, they managed to finish in second place, while This American Ape Life timed their Joker perfectly in Round 8 to win the night. Excellent job, everyone.

—————————————————

Interesting Notes from the Quiz!:

- Round 2 makes me want to do karaoke more often.

- Raleigh Rawdawg knew only Denzel Washington in our round on black Oscar winners. After that? They ultimately wrote down the names of black people they knew of. I’m pretty sure Kevin Hart has never - or will ever - win an Oscar.

- Starbucks sells a butt-ton of music because people don’t know any better, duh.

- Suge Knight just “allegedly murdered somebody with his car” just we like “allegedly breathe in oxygen to stay alive.”

Awesome Team Name Shout-Outs!:

- All I’ve Had Today is Like Six Gummi Bears and Some Scotch

- Halal! Is It Meat You’re Looking For?

- Disneyland Causes Autism

- Stouffer’s Family Size Lasagna

- You Wouldn’t Download a Cat

- Gitch Your Butt Party On

—————————————————

Natty Greene's Brewing Co.
505 West Jones Street
Raleigh, NC 27603
Tuesdays: 7:30 PM
View All Posts
Comment Now
9:33 AM, January 28, 2015
Scores
Lasagna For One 75

I've Got My Sleeping Bag; Bust Out the Shrek II 71

ASphincterSaysWhat? 70

Chicky Chicky Parm Parm 66

[MLG]xXxFantastic420NoScopexXx 65

Make Love, Not Bath Bombs 65

Irish Wristwatch 63

Listening to Raps and Shooting All the Jobs 63

Looks Like We Picked the Wrong Week to Quit Sniffing GlueƉ 60

Tom Brady's Perfect Balls 60

Constipated Internet? Try Google Fiber? 58

Semen Squeegies 57

We've Got Deflated Balls, Too! 57

You're Tearing Me Apart, Lisa! 57

Deflated Ballz 56

Motorcycle Diaries 53

Snow Way We're Gonna Win! 52

Raise Hell, Praise Dale 50

Tommy's Angels 38

Two Chicks 33

Hoffstradamus


Twitter
Web

Quiz Schedule
Tuesdays at Natty Greene's - 7:30PM-9:30PM (Raleigh, NC)
Alex Hofford (Hoffstradamus)

Hola! My name is Alex and I am the Quizmaster at Natty Greene's in Raleigh. I also perform comedy in the Triangle at DSI Comedy and with the improv group BONE CRACKER.

Ointment is a weird word.

Many of you have probably heard the talk of the town over the last couple of weeks - Clint Eastwood’s latest directorial endeavor, American Sniper. As a result, numerous discussions have popped up on the internet and news networks about the Iraq War, and the effects of war on veterans and their families.

However, one of the more interesting - and totally warranted - conversations about the movie centers around a very particular scene late in the film. The titular character, Chris Kyle (Bradley Cooper), has returned home from another tour of duty in Iraq, and he is sitting down with his wife and newborn child. It becomes immediately obvious that the baby they are holding is a fake baby. I’m talking a legit plastic baby doll.

Many people who have seen the movie - critics and moviegoers, alike - have taken to social media to blast the film for keeping such a glaring mistake in the final cut. Personally, I laughed out loud when I saw the doll. It’s absolutely ridiculous. 

Producers have since come out stating they had a couple of real-life babies to use for that scene, but they were either absent from set or sick that day. They had to make due with what they were given.

Then something dawned on me.

What if the fake baby is truly supposed to be a part of the movie?

Stay with me on this - Clint Eastwood is a very seasoned filmmaker, right? The dude knows what he’s doing. I’m sure he wouldn’t let such an obvious blemish to be in his movie if it weren’t for a reason.

Here’s what I think Eastwood is trying to convey in the movie with the doll: the effects of war and PTSD create such a disconnect between reality and the surreal that Kyle could not differentiate between an actual human child or a plastic baby doll.

Look in Cooper’s eyes in that scene. He seems detached and distant. His mind and attention is still on his buddies overseas, and his child doesn’t even register to him. That’s because, metaphorically and visually, his child is fake to him. The kid is the least of his concerns.

You know what? I…I just can’t pretend. That was the most ridiculous thing I’ve seen in an Oscar-nominated movie. Be prepared for an awkward laugh in the middle of such a serious film.

——————————————

Lasagna for One showed everyone how to stay the course and finish strong as they claimed and never relinquished the first place spot. A minor shake-up at the end propelled I’ve Got My Sleeping Bag; Bust Out The Shrek II to a well-deserved second-place finish. Excellent job, mis amigos.

——————————————

Interesting Notes from the Quiz!:

- I will never forget the sounds of surprise that washed over the room when I revealed that Canada and Australia both have more Nobel laureates than India.

- McDonald’s would never get rid of the McRib. I mean, you can’t technically get rid of something you keep retiring and bringing back over and over again, right?

- Round 8’s question on what is the widest river prompted many teams to answer with “Mississippi” instead of Amazon. People, I said “widest,” not “whitest.”

- Ann Coulter - you so crazy.

Awesome Team Name Shout-Outs!:

- Constipated Internet? Try Google Fiber

- Listening to Raps and Shooting All the Jobs

- [MLG]xXxFantastic420NoScopexXx

- Chicky Chicky Parm Parm

- ASphincterSaysWhat?

- You’re Tearing Me Apart, Lisa!

——————————————

Follow me on Twitter! - @ahoff101

Like the music at the quiz? Check out the Spotify playlist! Geeks Who Drink - Raleigh Jamz

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