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Billy's On Burnet
2105 Hancock Dr
Austin, TX 78756
Wednesdays: 7:00 PM
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10:14 PM, August 20, 2014
Scores
RPF140243 The Defiant Few 79

No Pressure! 78

RPF140389 I Know It Was You, Fettuccine Alfredo 77

RPF140244 Black Hoodie Collective 76

RPF140181 Lazertits 76

Rick Perry's Defense Team 72

COYS 70

In Like Flynn 67

Toast This!* 61

Mouserat 61

Robin Williams Isn't Dead, He's Just Waiting For Someone To Roll a 5 or 8 57

B-Team 55

Team Prius* 48

Rev. Lindsay


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Quiz Schedule
Saturday - Opal Divine's Davenport Village
Lindsay (Rev. Lindsay)

Lindsay enjoys writing bios for other people much more than for herself, and she really hates people (herself included) who speak in the third person. 

We interrupt this week's installment of ATMOQ because a wild Lindsay appears!

Rebecca and Shayne got called away by the Pinkerton Detective Agency so I had to run this shit this week.  Aside from the hearing loss gifted from THE LOUDEST TABLE IN THE WORLD(tm) that was sitting directly to my left, I had a phenomenal evening with the fine folks at Billy's.

We had a nailbiter of a tiebreaker for second place between No Pressure and I Know It Was You Fettucine Alfredo.  Ultimately, Presh won out and Fettucine was twirled up and other puns I could make about noodles but I won't.  The Defiant Few was triumphant with first.  B-Team was thrilled when they wound up not being in last place.

Tonight's visual round was people boning in artwork, round seven was technobabbling and led to me not be able to say numbers.  Round four covered current events and round six covered British-ish actors pretending to be southern.

Sorry for the things I said when my allergy medicine was wearing off.  I'm pretty sure I still like you.

See you next time!

-Rev. Lindsay

 

Twitter: @RevLinz

 

What's the deal with a Seinfeld quiz?  Find out here.

Billy's On Burnet
2105 Hancock Dr
Austin, TX 78756
Wednesdays: 7:00 PM
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10:44 PM, August 13, 2014
Scores
RPF140389 I Know it Was You, Fettuccine Alfredo 83

RPF140603 The Full On Rapists 74

RPF140243 The Defiant Few 69

The Perfectly Adequate Lebowskis 63

Black Hoodie Collective 61

RPF140390 Heroes of Telara 60

RPF140087 Soccer Cousins 59

Flying Spagetti Monsters 56

Bangarang! 56

PittsburghOlympics2024 50

Happy Campers 45

Camoflauge Condoms: She Never Saw It Coming 40

Pancocks 35

Meat 35

Less Than Thrilled 34

Booners 27

Texas Shaynesaw Massacre


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Quiz Schedule
Mondays: Upper Decks at 7PM! Wednesdays: Billy's on Burnet at 7PM!
Shayne (Texas Shaynesaw Massacre)

Hello. I am Shayne.

I like tacos.

Chapter One, Chapter Two, Chapter Three, Chapter Four, Chapter Five, Chapter Six, Chapter Seven, Chapter Eight, Chapter Nine, Chapter Ten, Chapter Eleven, Chapter Twelve, Chapter Thirteen, Chapter Fourteen, Chapter Fifteen

Ost'Cyxus the Bone Folder sat cross-legged by the campfire folding a set of leg bones he'd found in Cromwel'c's nest. The fire roared and popped as it cooked the slightly rancid meat the Folder of Bones had torn off the bones.

"That smells awful," said Edmund Mallard.

"It's food. Did you find any food? I found food," Osty responded.

"No, I just navigated our way up thirty-two flights in the shittiest, most horrifyingly fucked catacombs we've ever been in. And we've been in, like, an ass-ton of catacombs. You grabbed the first ancient corpse you found, stripped the thin, rotting flesh off of it, then sat down and stacked the bones because you have a ridiculous compulsion."

"I am NOT stacking bones. I'm folding them. It's a ritual. It's a tradition of my people. It's religious. You wouldn't understand."

"I don't understand. You're right about that. I don't understand at all. I can't possibly understand how you can waste time stacking bits of dead things when a THOUSANDS-YEAR-OLD DEMON MONSTER CREATURE BEAST IS CHASING US UP THE INSIDE OF A MOUNTAIN."

"Fine. You don't get to eat. See how easy it is climbing the rest of the way on an empty stomach. You shitty, shitty bird."

Edmund glared at the skull-masked man. Their partnership had always been tumultuous, but thirty-seven years locked in the Crimson Catacombs of Cromwel'c had taken its toll. And the last thirty-two flights had taken that toll and gave it a noogie.

Edmund gave Ost'Cyxus a noogie.

"What the fuck are you doing?"

Billy's On Burnet
2105 Hancock Dr
Austin, TX 78756
Wednesdays: 7:00 PM
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11:37 PM, August 06, 2014
Scores
RPF140181 Lazer Tits 91

RPF140389 I Know It Was You, Fettuccine Alfredo 89

RPF140243 The Defiant Few 84

In Talks With True Detective Season 2 84

This Is Not Strawberry Shortcake, This is Just a Tribute 84

Helen of Troy Aikman 81

Residue of the Big Bang 74

Just the Tip 74

Geekswhodrink.com/rumble 74

RPF140244 Black Hoodie Collective 73

RPF140390 Heroes Of Telara 69

I Don't Wanna Get Fucked, Gretchen 64

The Big Eyebrowski 64

This Ain't Even My Real Name 62

Where's Caitlin 59

It's Not Rape if You Yell Surprise 51

Texas Shaynesaw Massacre


Web

Quiz Schedule
Mondays: Upper Decks at 7PM! Wednesdays: Billy's on Burnet at 7PM!
Shayne (Texas Shaynesaw Massacre)

Hello. I am Shayne.

I like tacos.

Chapter One, Chapter Two, Chapter Three, Chapter Four, Chapter Five, Chapter Six, Chapter Seven, Chapter Eight, Chapter Nine, Chapter Ten, Chapter Eleven, Chapter Twelve, Chapter Thirteen, Chapter Fourteen

"Guuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh," said J'hrrarkk.

"S the F U," Novinho made those sounds with his mouth in response. He talked it. Speaked or whatever. I'm a good writer. Look at me go, writing things that people read.

----------------------------------

The light from the crystal pyramid (remember that thing? that was like a bajillion chapters ago) was extinguished as the entrance to the passageway crashed behind Zhahn Dik'kr. The grand warrior, clad in a light chainmail and tunic, did not hesitate even a moment, confidently entering the chamber.

It was some sort of chapel, built for a dark, horrid god. Tentacles lined the walls and there seemed to be a subtle, yet constant movement emanating throughout the room. A stench hung faintly in the air.

Zhahn slowly drew his blade. It glowed with a pale golden shimmer. His steps echoed across the hall, a wet splat reverberating back to him. A cold, moist breeze slapped Dik'ker across the face. The stench got worse as he moved forward.

In the center of the space was a grotesque fountain. As he walked closer, it was clear from where that awful scent came. The fountain, made of a frightening onyx as black as a Cannibal Corpse t-shirt, spewed a thick, viscous liquid that clearly once resided within a living creature. I'm saying that fucking fountain had blood in it, isn't that super gross and crazy? So scary. In the bowl, the skulls of various animals that had ventured down this far floated, vacant-eyed and lifeless.

Next to the fountain, a pedestal /;[ b shit, my dog ran across my keyboard---

Next to the fountain, a pedestal held a silver goblet encrusted with onyx stones. A metal placard was affixed to the pedestal, displaying a single word: Drink.

Zhahn stood in front of the goblet. This is fucking disgusting, he thought. Seriously. Bloody head juice? I have to fucking drink this shit? What is the point of this pointless exercise? I hate my life. I don't want to do this. Can I just give up already? Please? I just want to go live with my parents. At least I wouldn't have to drink blood. In fact, I'd probably get to, like, drink a fucking milkshake or something awesome. Mom always made awesome milkshakes. God, I could really go for a milkshake right now. It's been a looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong fuckin' time since I had a milkshake. Fuckin' chocolate-ass milkshake, mmm mmm mmmmmmmmmm. Fuck it, Zhahn, get a damn hold of yourself. You can do this. Don't give up now. Drink that shiiiiiiiiiiiii---

He dipped the goblet into the fountain and lifted it to his lips. With a sigh, he drank deeply.

"Holy shit," he said to nobody. "That tastes like a chocolate-ass milkshake."

"Delicious, yes?" A voice spoke from the dark.

"Who is there?" Zhahn asked.

"I am Cromwel'c."

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